My yoga teacher training is complete. I’ve spent over 200 hours learning and practicing but there’s this voice in my head that discourages me from running full throttle at teaching my first class. I could say I haven’t had enough time or that I didn’t finish all the books I wanted to read…but I know those are just excuses to cover up my fear of inadequacy. I tell myself I don’t know enough, or that I don’t have time, or that I won’t speak loud enough, or that my students won’t like me. I had a talk with that little discouraging voice and I told it to SHUT UP.
I started drawing my stick figures for my first class. I don’t know where it will be or how soon but I started and that was enough to help me believe in myself. I want to share yoga asana with other people and guide them through an experience that leaves them feeling sparked with the fire of love and light. This is the current mission and I’m on it. I am so excited to be a yoga instructor. My feet are wet, I just need to dive in. I can do this.
I feel the same way I did when my Dad took the training wheels off my bike. What did I need to do once he let go of the back of my bike seat? Balance and pedal. I didn’t worry about not being ‘good enough’ to ride a bike. (aaand there was also the consequence of falling and getting scraped up that kept me going lol).
I realize that all the worrying is making a simple thing way more complicated than it really is.
I remember hearing the advice “You’re getting in the way of yourself”…but never really understood it until now.
I’m going to keep reminding myself that yoga is like my bike, I just need to find balance and pedal. That’s my focus. (And besides that, not following my heart is even worse than getting all scraped up).
– Tavia Rahki